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No sir, that's not a weapon. It's a zester. » Philoxenos

Philoxenos

No sir, that’s not a weapon. It’s a zester.

27th November 2007

No sir, that’s not a weapon. It’s a zester.

posted in Uncategorized |

I am in the middle of my holiday baking and just this very minute I got out my citrus zester, which I’ll use to get/make zest from 4 oranges. While I was searching for the zester in the drawer I was reminded of the last time I handled the zester.

We were at the American Consulate in Auckland, New Zealand, going through security before our appointment for Handsome’s green card. I was going through my backpack, trying to find anything that might be considered a weapon. I found the usual things - nappies, baby wipes, change of baby clothes, a few stray church bulletins, tissues, some very old raisins, and… oh look! It’s a citrus zester! Just what every mother of three carries with her. Just in case of zesting emergencies, you know.

In case you’re wondering, I believe I rescued it from being donated to the op shop when we were moving and obviously my backpack was the nearest place for me to hide it. And since I’m so fastidious in cleaning out my backpack, it was still there a few weeks later when we went to the consulate.

There is one advantage to having a bit of clutter in one’s bag or car - one is prepared for whatever might happen. Like the time recently we visited the pumpkin patch and a friend arrived in her car and asked if I happened to have an extra pair of shoes that her daughter could wear. I rummaged around and, indeed, we had an extra pair. Or last Friday night, we went shopping at the local Christian bookstore and I started smelling something I’d rather not describe coming from my second daughter. I hadn’t brought my bag o’ tricks and was worried that we’d have to live with the smell all the way home. We went out to the car and I dug around and voila! I found a clean pair of panties in the boot (what’s that called in American? The place in the back of the car where you put the groceries? Oh. The trunk) and some wipes in the glove box. She was excited to wear panties since she normally wears diapers and I was excited to not have to travel home with the offending smell. And I’m sure the sanitation worker was really excited to empty that rubbish bin the next morning. And imagine if the Consular Officer had handed us a lemon and demanded we make lemon zest or else we’d be living in New Zealand forever.  We would have confidently completed the task. Everyone else in the room would have been out of luck, but we would be zesting to our heart’s content.

I got that citrus zester as a wedding gift and I’ve carried it around (sometimes literally!)  through seven moves, across oceans and back again. I think I’ll go do some zesting and relive the memories.

There are currently 4 responses to “No sir, that’s not a weapon. It’s a zester.”

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  1. 1 On November 27th, 2007, jen said:

    LOL Id almost guessed what must have happened with the zester in your backpack

    enjoy your memories

  2. 2 On November 28th, 2007, becominglikehim said:

    That’a a hoot!!

  3. 3 On November 29th, 2007, Holly said:

    Very, very funny! :)

  4. 4 On December 8th, 2007, Activities Coordinator said:

    My husband refers to my purse as a “survivalist handbag.” I’ve had a few airport encounters that where fun.

    “What’s in that metal box, Ma’am?”

    “Er…crayons.”

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