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2007 May 1 » Philoxenos

Philoxenos

It’s time to be super transparent

1st May 2007

It’s time to be super transparent

Okay, I’m going to be super honest here. Not that I’m anything less than honest any other time :)

Hello. My name is Michele and I have a problem. I have a problem with food. I eat too much of it. Whew. I’m glad that’s off my chest. Now if I could just get this extra 40 pounds off my (proverbial) chest too!!

Seriously, I have identified in the last few days that I’ve seriously got to get my act together. The Holy Spirit has been practically screaming at me STOP, PUT IT DOWN! And I turn my back on him and eat anyway, even when I know I’m not hungry. It doesn’t matter what it is, although it usually involves something with white sugar or flour. I can’t say I’ve ever overindulged in, say, green peas.

As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, when I’m pregnant I have the amazing ability to lose weight so that I walk into the hospital 9 months pregnant usually at the same weight I was when I got pregnant. This means that I eat whatever I want and not worry about it. With my first two pregnancies, I continued to lose weight for about three months after the babies were born. I wasn’t so lucky this time. But I continue to eat like it doesn’t matter and guess what??? I’m gaining weight!!!

I’m writing all this down, not to humiliate myself, but just to be honest. This is a huge struggle for me. I have no magic number that I want to attain. I simply want to be healthy, to set a good example for my kids, to live a long and full life unimpaired by weight-related issues. I know what to do - smaller portions, more fresh food, lots of water, exercise. I’ve got a head full of information about losing weight. I simply need to put it into practice. Simple huh?

Even while I’ve been ignoring the Holy Spirit, I’ve been begging him not to stop talking to me. I need Him. I’ve been talking to God about what my first step should be. First step: stop eating my own baking. It’s a fast of sorts. I did this last year, about this same time. I went a whole week without eating a single home-baked item (cookies, cakes, that kind of thing) and found that the longer I went without, the easier it was. And as a result I was eating more fruit and vegetables for snacks, rather than reaching for a muffin.

So, I’m going to start there. Lord, I lay down my food at your feet. I want to eat to live to serve you and for no other reason (you know, I’ve even prayed on occasion that my taste buds would be burned off or something!)

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